I suppose I must explain my ‘deeply superficial’ description. It’s quite simple really. I love gossip. Not London Lite’s latest whining on the Moss/Winehouse scandals. Whatever happened to the classic star system and worshipping the celestial ground on which they stood? When did we begin to libel their fun on Friday nights? We would have never defamed the Grecian Gods; which our modern-day celebrities are simply replacing.
No. I’m a lover of the common people’s drama. I guess it’s a legacy of my Mexican upbringing. My parents tried their best to prevent me from absorbing this culture, but what was I to do? There is nothing else on TV. The channels all tailor telenovelas to all ages: at 2pm is the kid’s version, and is always church oriented (which for some reason always had a ridiculously hot priest). At 7pm there is the teenage sing-along, whose entire cast look like plastic californian dolls who wear ridiculously short skirts- how they’re supposed to represent the Mexican youth remains a mystery to me. Oh and there are also those that cater for the bored housewives, while they wait for the husbands that cheat on them.
But I’m digressing- I love gossip and I hear loads of it. So I’ll probably let the cat out of the bag at some point. However, to maintain the anonymity of my beloved personas they will be referred to by pseudonyms. More specifically I’ll use the name of poets: Blake, Larkin, Yeats, Elliott – who famously divulged with the vision of poetic authority that “Life is very long”. He was 37. He hadn’t even lived half of his life yet. (This is by the way courtesy of August: Osage County on at the National Theatre, a play which I thoroughly recommend. It is laden with jokes which lighten the heavy theme of family relations). Anyhow. Poets. Alternatives are Shakespeare and Wilde; in which case I might as well add characters because I’d rather use Dorian Gray as a substitute name. But that seems unfair to musicians and actors, so add them to the list of options. Oh but hang on, one of my best personages is Selena-like (from Underworld) and she’s from a video game. Let’s just generalise it into ‘personalities’: fictional and real. Selena is a sexy (obviously) vixen who has been dating…David Hasselhoff (I’m basing this on his body)… despite this, something is not working. When they get jiggy-wiggy his jimmy wont sprout if you know what i mean… oops I think I just said too much. I’d better end this post.
By the way, if you hadn’t yet noticed- my mind wanders, but don’t worry, it never ambles further than I want it to.